Review 773: Ghosts of Girlfriends Past
Connor Mead (Matthew McConaughey) is a womanising photographer He’ll have sex with anyone who has a pulse but never stays for long. He arrives on the eve of his younger brother Paul’s (the epitome of blandness Breckin Meyer) wedding who still lives in the mansion of their late Uncle Wayne Mead (Michael Douglas). Big bro Connor is only there to dissuade him from getting hitched.
Also at the wedding is his childhood sweetheart and his one true love Jenny Perotti (Jennifer Garner aka Sydney Bristow, Elektra). But Connor is in for a nasty surprise when the ghost Uncle Wayne Mead appears as a spirit guide of sorts & tells “Dutch” that tonight he’ll be visited by three ghosts.
The first is the Ghost of Girlfriends Past (Emma Stone from Superbad) who appears to be doing her best impersonation of a 70s hippie while high.
The second ghost is the Ghost of Girlfriends Present (Noureen DeWulf) who shows Connor what it’s like to be on the outside looking in.
Finally, there’s the Ghost of Girlfriends Future (Olga Maliouk) in a non speaking part who makes a lot of gestures and shows Connor what will be if he doesn’t change I.e. dying alone and Jenny marrying would-be romantic rival Brad (Daniel Sunjata).
Now, the idea behind Ghosts of Girlfriends Past is an appealing one: Take a standard issue romantic comedy and wrap it up in a literacy classic. However, the screenplay by Jon Lucas & Scott Moore (The Hangover) lacks a certain wit and astuteness to make it a home run. It's plotting is relentlessly predictable for those who are familiar with the Dickens classic and never elevates beyond just a passable diversion
Directed by Mark Waters of Freaky Friday & Mean Girls fame as well as the under appreciated (and superior) fantasy romantic comedy Just Like Heaven, Ghost of Girlfriends Past is certainly a handsomely made film. The scenes at the Wayne Mannor were in fact shot at Castle Hill in Ipswich and it looks like as good a place as any for a wedding. The effects for making Douglas and Stone among other Ghostly are understated and rather effective.
Wether you like or dislike him, one of Matthew McConaughey’s defining characteristics is his easy going, laid back charisma however we don’t have much sympathy for his character, Connor is a sleazy, desperate creature, driven by his sexual desires, always looking as though he’d like to bite the head off his latest partner. He’s also not credible at playing Connor’s “redemption” which comes off perfunctory, but do you really care? We know that he & Jenny are going to get together by the end.
Even their whole backstory is fairly trite; Connor and Jenny were childhood friends and he wanted to kiss her at the middle school prom but he missed chance, so he got radicalised by his Uncle Wayne into being a womaniser - but then he and Jenny just rekindle their relationship anyway and yes he chickens out but they go through their own romantic relationships over their lives so the film is basically telegraphing
Also not convincing is the brotherly bond between Connor & Paul, the latter just comes off as pushover who’s given big bro Connor one chance too many and should just cut ties with him and Meyer’s subpar, charisma free performance doesn’t help. "He taught me how to read, he taught me how to ride a bike. He beat the crap out of any kid who teased me," Paul defends
Ghosts of Girlfriends Past is clearly positioned as a counterprogramming for Fox's superhero prequel X-Men Origins: Wolverine and will probably succeed. Does it get the job done for its intended romantic audience? Yes, I do believe that it does. Pitty, it's not good enough to live up to its own potential. 2.5/5.
The Anonymous Critic.
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