Review 131: The Man with the Golden Gun

The Man with the Golden Gun is a disgrace and the worst James Bond film ever.

Very loosely based on twelfth Bond novel, The Man with the Golden Gun by Ian Fleming.
Bond must find the missing "Solex Agitator," a device that will harness the sun's radiation and give awesome power to whomever possesses it. But, also vying for the prize, is Francisco Scaramanga (Christopher Lee), a world-class assassin who brandishes a distinctive golden gun. When 007 discovers he may be Scaramanga's next target, he is hurled into a deadly game of cat-and-mouse, continuing the search as he evades the killer on his trail. Bond must also contend with Scaramanga's exotic lover, Andrea Anders (Maud Adams), and Nick Nack (Hervé Villechaize), whose small size belies his lethal abilities. Even as 007 enlists the aid of sensuous Mary Goodnight (Brit Ekland), he must overcome ferocious odds to survive an explosive showdown on Scaramanga's remote island.

The problem with the plot is that it's at all competing or exciting, at no point is it interesting and at no point is it executed well. It uses the 1973 Oil Crisis as a backdrop and as a result just comes off as lame and dated.
It lacks invention and creativity and it just comes across as a tedious backdrop, as well as uninspired, tired and boring. It's never told with any flair or energy or soul or passion.

It also reflects the then-popular Martial arts film craze of that era and that just comes off as lame and silly. A scene where the villains try to dispose of him at a martial arts skill and is subsequently saved the daughters of his contact, Lieutenant Hip is nothing more than laughable.

Even thought the subject matter is much more serious than Diamonds Are Forever and Live and Let Die, it's still played mostly for laughs than anything else. The campy tone overweighs the serious tone making it more of a James Bond parody.

They probably should have stuck to a simple duel of titans between Bond and Scaramanga, it would have been far more exciting and interesting.

I would honestly rather watch a lake dry up whilst keeping an eye on trees for a fortnight whilst watching a TV show of Albert Finney, Jack Nicholson and Al Pacino filing their taxes, it is that boring an experience.

Returning Director Guy Hamilton (his fourth and final film in the series) is dutiful, he stages the funhouse scenes and the action scenes with so little enthusiasm he seems as board as the audience watching it. The production design is tacky (look at Scaramanga's funhouse), just looking at it gives some idea of what it might be like to be dead. The costume design is cheap, the cinematography is murky, the score is boring and is not up to composer John Barry's usual standards, the effects are weak, the action scenes are tedious, the climax in Scaramanga's funhouse is so sleep inducingly dull that you'll honestly want to fall asleep. The locations are mundane, the pace drags, the title song by Lulu is terrible, the scenery is banal, the suspense is more numbing than killing, the jokes fall flat and the stupid Sheriff Pepper character pops up again and latches onto Bond for another extended car chase. thankfully the character never appeared again in the series. It goes on for way to long. The Golden Gun prop however looks spectacular.

The pacing meanders and never takes off. A detour to Beruit feels completely superfluous and out of place considering Bond is searching for a golden bullet that killed a fellow 00 agent even though one was just sent to M.I.6. Even the whole climax of the film on Scaramanga's island because the characters act like complete idiots; after successfully retriving the Solex Agitator, Bond passes it onto Goodnight who ends up getting captured by Scaramanga under very contrived circumstances

In any sensible world, they would be on a slow boat back to England, Mission: Accomplished - The End.

Possibly worst of all is that the film features one of the coolest car stunts ever in Bond film: a giant corchscrew leap that the producers had actually planed years before the film went into production and the effect is completely ruined by a stupid slide whistle sound effect.

The acting is dreadful, Roger Moore is at his absolute worse here and comes off as board with the film,

Britt Ekland just comes off as annoying and honestly quite hopeless playing Mary Goodnight, Bond's M.I.6 contact and fellow field agent. The character is clearly supposed to be a highly trained and capable spy and Bond's equal, but she just comes off as nothing more or less than a complete and inept ditz who keeps getting herself into one bad situation after another.
The fact that she's portrayed as such a ditz is (much like the rest of this trainwreck of a film) meant to be funny but her position as an M.I.6 isn't supposed to be. They genuinely want us to take her seriously as Bond's equal and it falls completely flat.
Moore and Ekland share practically no chemistry on screen and they come across as more of a squabbling married couple than a pair of professional M.I.6 agents on mission.

The less said about Hervé Villechaize as Nick Nack: Scaramanga's dwarf manservant and accomplice the better.

Possibly the only two good performances come out of Maud Adams as Andrea Anders: Scaramanga's mistress and Cristopher Lee as the titular villain.
Adams beautifully and sympathetically conveys the vulnerability and

Cristopher Lee's Francisco Scaramanga was a phenomenal villain.  Unfortunately, his dastardly plan of selling solar energy machines to the highest bider is boring and detracts from what could be a very simple but gripping  between two "assasins" with more intimate stakes. They probably should have stuck to a simple duel of titans between Bond and Scaramanga which would have been far more exciting and interesting.

Scaramanga seems like the sort of character who would work best as an assassin, someone who seeks to "create a masterpeice: The Death of 007" as he eloquently put it.

Soon-Tek Oh is o.k. as Lieutenant Hip: Bond's local contact in Hong Kong and Bangkok and

Even Clifton James shows up again as the unbearably stupid Sheriff Pepper from Live and Let Die in an extended cameo. He serves practically no purpose in the films narrative (or lackthereof) and is only there to provide more painfully unfunny laughs. His presence I this film is based on how he just happens to be on vacation in Thailand. Quelle coïncidence!

The Man with the Golden Gun misses the target, 0.5/5.

The Anonymous Critic